The First Love is the Deepest 5-6-09

I wish I could watch AMC as often as I would like and I even admit that sometimes it isn't worth watching anyway. However, I do keep up to date and catch as many eppies I can per week. Monday's eppy was ripe with Erica and that funky ass red and black "push-up" dress that she was still wearing. Erica was discussing Adam to someone and she told that someone that Adam could still slay dragons. That is almost as strange a comment as the time Colby asked Erica if she loved Adam. Erica responded: "I love him like ice cream." What the hell is that supposed to mean? Erica is still hot for Ryan and was doing everything in her power to convince Ryan that a relationship with Kendall would never work out. For once, I agree with LaKane.
J.R. momentarily lost Little A(sshole)and Marissa strolled up and casually insulted J.R.'s parenting skills. J.R. went off on her; but, I can see where this is going. I know there is supposed to be some scandalous love triangle hoppin' soon between Marissa, J.R., and Scott. Oh Joy. Ian needs heart surgery (that just happens to involve that damn heart valve) or he is going to die. Krystal got pissed at Marissa for "going there" with J.R. so Marissa packed her stuff and moved out. I hate how David is trying to play the good guy in the middle as if he were capable of such behavior. At the end of Monday's eppy, David stated he would not operate on Ian. Today's episode consisted of Adam (whom I believe is really Stuart) being an ass, as usual. He continues to panick over finances and act like a blooming idiot which prompts my soap senses to seriously tingle whenever he is on screen. I know it's Stuart because they have to kill off David Canary for now; but they will bring him back later and it won't be in the form of Stuart. Mark my words! If I am wrong, I will buy everyone cheeseburgers. Now that I am almost 100% positive that Crishell Stause is leaving, I can't help but wonder who Jake will be paired with next. I think it would be completely unneccesary to pair him with old-Harley or whatever the hell her name is. (omg, my foot is asleep) J.R. recalled the day Dixie was killed (the 2nd or 3rd time) and remembered seeing Adam looking through the window watching her die and creepy smiling. This came custom with flashbacks which only solidified my belief that it is really Stuart. Erica finally changed out of that dress. TTL! Krystal's dress was hideous. Adam/Stuart threatened Krystal through the whole episode while she sat around looking scared and lying to everyone. Scott, the Dork, is much to invested in this heart valve b.s. I cannot wait until it's over. Bring on the killer!

I love it when I get to see Y&R early and today was my lucky flippin day! Jack sincerely told Sharon that he loves her and wants to help raise the baby. Sharon told Jack she wasn't sure if she would keep the baby or not. Sharon was about to confess all things Billy when an eavesdropping Mary Jane/Mari Jo made her presence known. She then perched herself on the desk as if she were a vulture waiting for her prey. Sharon was becoming increasingly uncomfortable when who should walk in...Billy! He has arrived for a meeting put together by Mary Jane the psycho stalker. Sharon couldn't take anymore, and she ran out of there so fast the door hit her in the ass. I found it amusing she kept holding her belly and she was "so" tired. Um. Note to Sharon: You have only been pregnant for 2 minutes. At Restless Style, the sh*t hit the fan as the photographer came down with some funky illness, the wrong backdrop was delivered, and Nick announced that he would be active COO for Newman from now on. I thought that if I had to hear Phyllis say "How am I supposed to do this without you?" one more time, I was going to morph through the screen and strangle her with her own chunky bead necklace. That would have been a waste of a good necklace. Phyllis snitched on Nick to Nikki, who was none to pleased with his new job description. The only thing worse than a man that goes running to his mother is a man's wife that goes running to his mother. Sharon left Jabot and returned to her room at the club and laid down. She then had a dream in which Nick was pushing a little girl on the swing and Cassie came out of nowhere and started chattin it up with Sharon. OK. At first, the dream was real sweet and all. But then, it just got creepy from there. Cassie said "See I told you there would be another little girl." Sharon put her hand on her belly and said "Oh, I'm having a girl. That makes me so happy." Cassie replied "No. The little girl is already here. Summer is the little girl." Cassie suddenly turned into Jack who said the usual crap and then turned into Billy being an asshole. Billy really was banging and screaming at her door, demanding to be let in. When she finally let him in he asked her if she was with child. Lot's of Billy scenes as he informed Chloe of his job search. She asked him why he just can't be happy with what he's got; to which he replied: "I don't want to settle." He then made up some b.s. about going out for a while. Chloe did some spying and found out that he was headed to Jimmy's and Mac was working. Over at Jimmy's, a push-up bra packing Mac was wiping tables when Billy came in. She asked him what she could get for him. He said 'sex on the beach'. He just screams class, doesn't he? Chloe showed up as Billy escaped without being seen. Chloe confronted "Mother Theresa" about the kiss and kindly reminded her that she and Billy are so much alike it's scary and that they are like "little devils". I could tell that Mac was scared of little Chloe but also pissed because she knows she could have Billy if she wanted him. You will probobly never hear me say this again, but, bravo to Clementine Ford for depicting emotion in a relevant way to the storyline. At the business meeting between Billy, Jack, and Mary Jane, Jack let it slip about Sharon's papoose and the look on Billy's face was classic and priceless all at the same time. I thought his face was melting for a second.

Honorable Mentions:

Chloe to Mac: "I love me some ribs. Do you love ribs?"

Mary Jane tells Jack to keep the night open because she wants to celebrate. Jack, worried about Sharon says: "We'll see."

Mary Jane is talking strategy and Jack's concentration is obviously somewhere else. Billy says: "Chop Chop, big brother. Get your head back in the game."

The latter made me think of something else that I hate. All you HSM fans know what I am talking about!

Until later...same bitch time...same bitch channel...