Nacho Mama Drama 3-30-09

It was a great day in the world of soaps. It started with Katherine going of on Jill. Nothing new there. Enter Nikki, who tells Jill that if anyone is an imposter it is her. Victor and Ashley are having a heart to heart about Adam when they hear a "thump" from his room. As usual, it was just another cry for attention from Adam. Unbeknownst to them, Adam was eavesdropping the whole time. Olivia stops by to chat with Ashley, which was really boring. Lily finally grew some balls and broke it off with Cane. Why, oh why then, did she decide to put the giant ring on after he left heart broken? Enter Olivia (big screen time for her today) who makes a big deal out of the "engagement". Way to make her feel better, Aunt Liv. Kevin made Amber rob a bank and it was quite funny. First, Amber was mouthing "help me" into the security camera which is going to end up saving her ass in the end. Then, Kevin fell out in the course of the robbery. Who does that? Amber gets him out of there, but then the car won't start! The cops are getting closer and Kevin's wound is gettng worse. Meanwhile, stupid Jeffery is still on a mission to get Gloria back and somehow thinks he is going to seal the deal by dragging the big dumb bounty hunter around. Janna has a really bad migraine that keeps getting worse. That means (in soapology terms) that Janna is getting her brain tumor back. That could be a good thing since her husband is homicidal. You know what they say...if you can't beat them, join them!

On B&B today, Eric hired Rick a body guard. Brooke heard the news and practicly tongue wrestled with Rick the next time she saw him. Just a mention: Thomas was wearing a sweater that kind of reminded me of 'Where's Waldo". Ridge and Rick call a "truce". How many does this make now? 23? To show that he is willing to accept Rick in exchange for his silence, Ridge gives Steffy the wedding dress he has been working on all her life. I thought Taylor was going to scream like a banshee and scratch his eyes out like a wild animal. This is going to lead to some Ridge and Doc lovin in the afternoon, or at least I hope it does. Just when I thought I had finally caught a great episode of B&B, it was ruined when they cut to Rick and Steffy making out. NO ONE CARES! All I know is that I hope that Don Diamont gets this kind of air time when he starts on this show. Maybe, just maybe, he can breathe some life into B&B. Or, maybe he will sleep with Brooke. Snore.